Saturday, September 22, 2012

And you too can be the lucky owner of glorious mannequin hand!!!

Have you ever caught yourself thinking "DAMN!!!  I wish I had my very own mannequin hand to do as I wish with!"  Well, now all your dreams can become a reality because I am doing my first ever giveaway!!!

WOW!!!  What a giveaway!!!


I know...  It's too exciting for words!  

Others may be thinking "Valerie...  What the fuck am I going to do with a mannequin hand?!"  Well, here are some ideas for you, because I am a good person and proud owner of my very own mannequin hands.

Mannequin hands are awesome at morning coffee!!!

Kids LOVE mannequin hands!!!

Scare your friends and family!

Have Anthony Michael Hall sign it!  He LOVES mannequin hands!

Let mannequin hands free your artistic spirit!


I can feel your excitement building!!   


All you need to do in order to win this fantastic prize is the following:

  1. Become a follower of this blog by clicking on the "follow me" button on the right hand side of this page under "Team Val".
  2. Leave a comment below about what you would do with your mannequin hand.

That's it people!!!  So, go on!  Get to it before it's too late...  Winner will be announced on September 29th, my birthday! 

VIVA LA VALTEMBER!!!

22 comments:

  1. oh here it is LOL well that hand will make it where I will never be alone again ;-)

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    1. Mannequin hands make the PERFECT companion!!

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  2. If I were to win said mannequin hand, its uses would be endless!!!! For instance: mannequin hands free kit for my cell phone,mannequin cruise control (for those long trips and sunday drives),mannequin back sctatcher...for those hard to reach places, and for those lonely nights...... ;)

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    1. I like where this is going... I feel an infomercial coming on! ;oD

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  3. Okay, I've made my stealth, stalkery following of this blog official! And what wouldn't I do with mannequin hands?! Honestly, I am in a never ending game of "freak out" (for example; she goes into the bathroom and after she shuts the door I sneak up with my quiet ninja moves and make an X with my body over the whole door frame and put my "crazy face" on and when she opens the door I scare the ever loving crap out of her, things like that) with my middle daughter, who is 16 so calm down anyone who thinks I'm playing scary mind games with like a 7 year old. While I am already the reigning champ, (she tries god love her but I've got years of freaking out the hubs working in my favor) this would allow me to reach such a level of awesome freak out-niss that she will probably call CPS on me but would still be worth it. Plus, they'd make a great conversation piece.

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    1. Welcome!! I love being ninja stalked. It's true. I try to convince Eddie to dress up as a ninja and stalk me all the time. Wait... That sounded dirty...

      Anyway... Kid torturing is one of the best uses for mannequin hand! Ask my kids! I get them all the time!

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  4. It won't let me!! Grrrrr. Does it count that I get your updates on FB, I always always ALWAYS comment AND I told Noa you should be a Funny Bitch? Does it? Well, it should. Because my life will not be complete without that hand.

    What would I NOT do with it, is the question. I'd use it to slap my boss upon his asshole face when I quit that bitch, I'd goose my husband every chance I get, I'd get random strangers to pose for pics, I'd scare the bejeezus out of my precious and sensitive children . . . Oh the list goes on and on.

    Please?

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    1. I love you so much!! If you don't win, and I meet you one day, I will bring you one as an offering to your awesomeness!! Because I, too, am awesome. :oD

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  5. Ooh, mannequin hand!!! Is it anything like Thing from The Adams Family? Cause that would be really handy ... see what I did there?

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    1. I see what you did there... and I like it. Probably more than the legal amount of like. :o)

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  6. With Halloween coming up, this has so much creepy potential. Plus, I'm always looking for new ways to creep out my kids.

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    1. Kids LOVE being creeped out by mannequin hand! I think I read that on the internet somewhere... So it MUST be true!

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  7. Holy crap, can I win a hand signed by Anthony Michael Hall with "Southern Gentleman" facial hair?
    Things that I would do with a disembodied hand:
    1) Soothing massager of arses
    2) Tether ball advantage-giver
    3) Hard-to-reach-parts-of-the-back scratcher
    4) Spoon holder
    5) Taint-tickler (this will NOT be illustrated in picture form)
    6) Be the envy of lonely truckers trying to earn extra money at glory holes
    7) Deal a game of cards for the dead...I cannot promise this but it sounds cool
    8) Toupee massager
    It all comes around full circle.

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    1. Not only is the hand signed by AMH, but he wrote "Touch me, Valerie" on it... He is probably one of the most awesome people EVER!

      You rock at mannequin hand uses by the way. It makes me wish I had a toupee.

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  8. I would paint her nails. Not that original, but that's what I would do.

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    1. You know... I have been working on freeing up an evening to do just this... I'm glad that I'm not the only weirdo.

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  9. I would scare my children, and encourage them to scare one another. Though, I think that goes without saying, right? I mean, what's the point of having children if you're not going to bring fear and torture into their lives on a daily basis?

    Did I just say that? I MEANT to say, what's the point of having a mannequin hand if not to torture children. That's much better, right?

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    1. YES!!! Teach the next generation the glory that is MANNEQUIN HAND!!!!

      It's true. It's the whole reason I bought them. Then I got the arm. Careful! It's addictive!

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  10. I would scare the crap out of my daughter as often as possible!! Then move on to scaring my mother and mother in law!!! Oh what fun I would have with my own mannequin hand!!

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    1. You had me at scaring your mother-in-law Jeanne... You had me at scaring your mother-in-law...

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  11. Anthony Michael Hall was probably just relieved to be posing with a fan holding a mannequin hand and not a pair of panties. I'd think the panty thing would get old after 28 years.

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    1. Anthony Michael Hall can have my panties any day. I think he should run for president... of my heart.

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